What was the Question?

Allen Iverson, dubbed "The Answer", has recently announced his retirement from the NBA, and though I was never a fan, I respected his grit and toughness and the way he played everyday.  While he will be remembered for many things on and off the court, hopefully he will continue to stay in the public eye.  Perhaps resuming his once promising rap career..

Jewelz (AI) - Last Night


*Though he announced his retirement, Allen Iverson may still return to the NBA (perhaps the 76ers will sign him for a goodbye tour, and to fill some seats).

Thank you Joe G. for bringing this song into my life 4+ years ago.

The Closest I'll Get To Being A Boyscout...

This might have been the most important thing I learned in a college class.  It was definitely the most memorable.

"Take care of the 'what ifs' now, so there are no 'oh shits' later."

Brand New - Sic Transit Gloria... Glory Fades

I feel like it's been a while since I posted a new song. 

I don't know what it is about this song, but it drew me in years ago and hasn't let go...

(As I've said before, I think music is better appreciated without video, but I couldn't find a good audio only version to embed.  Just close your eyes and enjoy the music.)

The Devil is in the Details

Maybe it is true that we ‘learn something new everyday’. But, if that is the case, most of those new bits of information pass seemingly unnoticed into our subconscious. Sometimes though, that new knowledge resonates and we feel a need to pass it along… Isn’t it awesome that I have this blog as a forum for such things?


Like all religions and ethnicities, the Jewish people have faced stereotypes, myths and misnomers for centuries. I won’t propagate any of these, but there is one that has always seemed more outrageous than the rest, ‘Jews have horns’.
I have always believed this ‘myth’ was created to ‘demonize’ the Jews and make them easier scapegoats for things such as the crucifixion of Christ and the fall of the German empire prior to the Holocaust, among other ridiculous accusations. Only yesterday did I learn the truth, and it turns out, this ‘myth’/misnomer, while inconvenient has legitimate roots.

“When Moses comes down from Mount Sinai, Exodus says, his face glows with rays of light. But the Hebrew word for ‘rays’ can also be translated as ‘horns’ – karan vs. keren. When Saint Jerome translated the Old Testament into Latin, he thought no one but Christ should glow with rays of light – so he advanced the secondary translation. And that’s how Michaelangelo carved his Moses. With horns.” – The Rule of Four (written by Ian Caldwell and Dustin Thomason)

And there it is…

Guiltless Pleasures

The term ‘guilty pleasure’ is thrown around a lot.  Maybe it’s because I am so secure in myself, or maybe it’s because I lost my dignity and shame a long time ago, but either way, I don’t really believe in guilty pleasures (for the most part). I think if you enjoy something then you shouldn’t have to hide it.  This especially holds true with music.  Here are some songs that tend to have the label ‘guilty pleasure’, but which I think we all secretly enjoy.

I’d ask you to chime in, but that would totally go in the face of the guilty pleasure principle. So please, cower and enjoy these songs with your windows rolled all the way up.

Walk Like An Egyptian – The Bangles
Who brain doesn’t immediately flash to an image of the ‘Egyptian’ dance when this song comes on?

I’m Too Sexy – Right Said Fred
This song may be the corniest ever written… BUT, don’t pretend you don’t know the words…

I Wanna Dance With Somebody – Whitney Houston
I guess it’s acceptable for women to like this song, but every man has to admit Whitney can belt out a tune.  It’s catchy as hell.

Dress You Up In My Love – Madonna
Wacky as she has become, it’s hard for anyone to admit to liking Madonna, but her musical talent is undeniable (at least in the 80’s and 90’s). And this song rocks.

Summer Girls – LFO
You’ll snicker when it comes on the radio or someone’s iPod, but you won’t turn it off...

Hero – Enrique Iglesias
This one is dedicated to a former roommate of mine who happened to enjoy this song more than most... Sure, it’s about the sappiest song ever written, but everyone wants to be someone else’s hero.

Anything by MC Hammer or Vanilla Ice
Stop; collaborate and listen, Ice is back with a brand new invention: the Hammer Pants.

Comcast.. more like Bombcast.

Sorry for the bad title pun, but...

Can we agree that ‘small’ and ‘fast’ are not mutual exclusive?  It is possible to be both small and fast, right? I mean, it worked for Speedy Gonzalez.

For those who do not have to suffer through Comcast commercials, the latest brainchild is thus:

A small business owner talks about his company. Then we learn how Comcast Internet can make the business run faster. Finally the small business owner tells us “Now I don’t have a small business, I have a fast business.”

For the love of all things grammatical and true, it’s still a small business, even if it’s fast.  And on top of that, 'fast' doesn't even mean efficient or productive.

Comcast- I have to suffer with your crappy service, your ridiculously high bills, and your never ending junk mail.  The least you can do is spend your marketing budget on commercials that make sense.

Take A Ride In My Cameo..

A cameo is when a well-known person makes a brief and often un-promoted appearance in a performance movie or television show. With the emergence of ‘acting troups’ (for lack of a better term) the cameo has re-defined itself. Whenever a Vince Vaughn film is released, you know Jon Favreau, Ben Stiller or an Owen brother is bound to show up. When you watch an Adam Sandler film, you know Rob Schneider will inevitably make an appearance. For me, the best cameos are unexpected and often have comedic overtones. Below are some of my favorite cameos of all time. What are yours?

Danny Glover – Maverick / Martin Sheen – Hot Shots Part Deux
When executed properly it can be very funny when characters/actors reference other works they have starred in together. In Maverick, Danny Glover (cameo) and star Mel Gibson cross paths and after a fleeting ‘I know you, don’t I’ moment, Danny delivers his trademark “I’m too old for this sh*t” which is best known from the Lethal Weapon movies in which the two actors starred together. In Hot Shots Part Deux, Martin Sheen (cameo) and Charlie Sheen, both parodying other movies make a not so-subtle reference to the movie Wall Street in which the father/son duo both starred.

Bob Saget – Half Baked
This one isn’t safe for work and you won’t see it in the television-censored version, but trust me, Bob Saget’s appearance is hilarious.

Lance Armstrong – Dodgeball
Coming off several Tour De France wins Lance Armstrong (playing himself) delivered a smart and funny ‘pep-talk’ to would-be quitter Peter, which alters the course of the movie and directly leads to the dramatic conclusion.

Billy Crystal – The Princess Bride
Playing Miracle Max, a bitter and aged miracle worker Crystal is no throw-away character. Though it’s only a brief appearance, he plays a vital role in the movie, and it’s hard to imagine anyone else in this role. The witty banter between he and has wife is intelligent, funny and expertly delivered.

Lawrence Taylor – The Waterboy
There is no funnier or more well place cameo than that of legendary football player and ‘accussed’ drug addict, Lawrence Taylor in The Waterboy. While the movie itself is average, the one-liner delivered by LT (playing himself) will forever be ingrained in my memory. “Gentlemen, which brings me to my next point: Don’t smoke crack.” The humor, sadly, was only enhanced because two weeks prior to the release of this movie LT was arrested for trying to buy $100 of crack from an undercover agent.

 
So there you have a few of my favorite cameos (off the top of my head).  Tell me yours.

Tax Break

So, we've tried Cash for Clunkers.  And we've given free money to new home buyers.  I have another idea to stimulate the economy...

Let's enact a tax break whereby recent graduates, now claiming themselves independent, can get a one year tax break while they get off their feet and on their own.

I was not naive.  When I got my first job after graduation and began calculating my budget I adjusted for taxes upwards of 25% of my salary.  I knew what kind of lifestyle I would be able to afford.  Still, it was a shock to see nearly 30% of my salary (apparently I underestimated my taxes originally) gone before it hit my bank account.

Today, most graduates have to pay rent, car insurance, gas and electric, groceries, cable and internet, and student loans. Let us also not forget about gas to and from work, as well as set-up costs (like furniture and kitchen accessories).  Additionally, none of this includes extraneous expenses like movies or traveling to stay in touch with friends from college who moved to wherever. The life of a college graduate is very expensive.
A tax break for graduates not only allows our young work force a chance to get off their feet, but it should greatly stimulate the economy.  Unlike older Americans who tend to be established and more focused on long-term financial well-being, graduates are more likely to spend (to pay off student loans, buy furniture for his/her new place, dinner and dates, etc.) rather than save excess money, thus reinvesting it into the economy. 
 
 
This may be a side-note, and I'll probably vent about this later, but let's not forget that the young workforce of American is investing in a social security program that they may never benefit from.  Maybe that one-year tax break will allow those new graduates to start saving for their uncertain future.

Economics 101

I don't claim to be an economist and honestly politics bore me to no end.  With that said, the current state of the economy affects all of us and maybe it's time to speak up.  I have a few questions/issues/ideas for those in power.  Over the next few days or weeks or months (or whenever I feel appropriate) I will raise some of these points.  Whether they make sense to you or not, maybe it will at least stimulate debate and discussion and in some small way, make a difference.  PLEASE comment and let me know if anything makes sense or if I'm the dumbest person alive or if you know anyone of influence who would like to sit down and talk.

Before I blow your mind with my genius, let's start on a small scale.

- If our taxes go towards the building of roads, why do we also have to pay to park on them?
- If our taxes go towards the building of bridges, why do we have to pay to use them?

Thank You

With Veteran's Day right around the corner this seemed fitting.

"It is the soldier, not the reporter who has given us the freedom of the press. It is the soldier, not the poet, who has given us the freedom of speech. It is the soldier, not the campus organizer, who gives us the freedom to demonstrate. It is the soldier who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the protester to burn the flag."

Say What?

This is an excerpt from a conversation overheard at an Iowa bus stop:

"My boyfriend forgot to buy condoms, so I gave him one of my birth control pills. That will work right?"

Can we agree to preach abstinence, but teach sex education?

- Thank you Ryan L. for passing along this gem.

It's No Accident That I've Had No Accidents

I’ve already given some superficial advice on cars, but now, here is some practical knowledge.

Knock on wood, but I’ve only been in one VERY minor accident while driving (I was 17 and even my parents don’t know about it). Anyway, here are some very simple tips for avoiding trouble:

- If someone is driving with both hands (usually at 10 and 2) get away from them. This is a sign he/she is either a newer driver or uncomfortable behind the wheel. A car should be an extension of us. We should be able to guide it easily with one steady hand.

- I scan license plates. If the car has a personalized plate (that isn’t really tacky) I assume that the driver cares about his/her car; that he/she spends a lot of time in it. That he/she knows how to drive. I trust these people (as much as I trust any driver that isn’t me).

- I scan license plates. I notice where the drivers are from. People who aren’t from New York (for instance) think New Yorkers are the worst drivers in the world. Truth is, if you can drive in NYC, you can drive anywhere. If the car in front of me, on the other hand, is from Florida I assume the driver is past his/her prime and his/her eyesight may be going and his/her reflexes may be fading. I’m gonna be real careful until I can visually confirm the driver is not a member of AARP.

- I avoid cars with 3 or more passengers. Drivers can be distracted by phones and ipods and a million other things these days, but most of these are hard to detect from a distance. Four heads in the back window are much easier to spot.

- I’m not saying all women are bad drivers... I’m just not taking the chance that the one next to me is the exception.


While the above tips are for the more advanced, the biggest key to avoiding accidents is to keep alert.
-Notice the pattern of the car in front of you – does the driver have a steady pace or does his/her speed keep changing? Does he/she change lanes a lot? Does he/she come to a smooth stop or slam the breaks?
-Keep an eye on the rear view mirrors - know who is coming up from behind. Are they racing up? Are there other cars in their path? Are they likely to cut you off or ride your a$$?
-Observe what’s next to you - where will you go if the car in front of you stops short? Does the car next to you have a reason to change lanes; to cut you off?

Hopefully this is useful advice. Less accidents on the road are better for everyone.

Thanks Pops for teaching me how to drive.

Butterfly Effect

I’m saddened to say this, but an Ashton Kutcher movie changed my life.

Did I get your attention? Are you vomiting in your mouth a little?

Well, let me explain before you decide to never again visit this blog.

In 2004, The Butterfly Effect, was released in theaters and a few months later I actually got sucked into watching it on HBO. The movie itself was actually not bad (the casting of Amy Smart really helped), but it was the premise of the Butterfly Effect that really caught my attention (this theory/premise is in many movies, but this one has it in the title, so…).
For us laymen, the Butterfly Effect basically implies that even the smallest thing can change everything; that the flapping of a butterfly’s wing can change the atmospheric pressure, which can change the weather, which can cause a monsoon, which can destroy a home…

While the butterfly analogy goes a little far for my tastes, I think it puts real perspective on who each of us is and why. Over the last year I’ve spent a good deal of time evaluating who I am and the life I’ve ‘chosen’. I’ve spent a lot of time wondering ‘what if’. The interesting thing is that I’m noticing the questions stem, not from the big decisions, but the little ones. In fact I’ve noticed that in large part my life has been determined by actions, events and ultimately circumstances out of my control.
Some people say they live life with no regrets; that everything they’ve done – for better or worse – has led them to who they are. While this sentiment is certainly true, and I like who I am, there are absolutely things I would change; words I would take back, actions I would undo, and moves I would make… As I wrote in an earlier post, maybe it’s for the best that we can’t go back and change things, but it sure is interesting to think about.

The Greatest Thing Since...

We’ve all heard the expression “… is the greatest things since sliced bread”. Sure, pre-sliced bread is convenient, but really, this expression is ridiculous. I've therefore taken it upon myself to do a little research and see if we can’t come up with something better.

The Rubber Band – Uses include: keeping papers together, making sure your deck always has 52 cards, accessorizing the wrist, and flinging at friends and/or teachers. There is no doubt the rubber band is one of the most versatile and useful tools created. It was patented in March of 1845.

The Hoodie – There are few things better than putting on a hoodie on a brisk morning. Though its popularity soared in the 1970’s, the hoodies’ roots can be traced back to the cloaks of early Monks. (Please don’t let me catch you with a sweatshirt sans hood.)

The Thong – God bless Rudi Gernreich who invented the thong in 1974.

At this point I could mention computers or DVD players or other trivial nonsense, but eight out of ten men agree that since 1974 there truly is no greater invention. So there you have it; sliced bread is out, and the thong is in.

(All dates and seemingly intelligent information is courtesy of Wikipedia.)