Saturday, February 26, 2011

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Goals

Recently goals have become a big part of my life.  With so much going on it's becoming too easy to let things go.  The gym, my writing, this blog. 

The only way I know to stay on top of things is to create goals.  To give myself something to shoot for.  Still, I have learned (through experience and even classes - management classes in particular) there are some rules to create meaningful goals.  Below are a few of these rules:

1) Goals must have deadlines.  A goal cannot serve to motivate you if there is no timeframe in which it must be attained.  The goal date should also be visual.  By that I mean it should be fairly short-term.  Think about the difference between a goal you have to hit in 3 weeks and one you have to hit in 3 years.  Which is going to get you more motivated?

2) Goals must be narrow.  Don't go to the gym "to get bigger"..  Go to the gym "to bench press XXX amount of weight".  Don't say "I want to post more in my blog", say "I want to post 15 times this month"..  See the difference?

3) Maybe most importantly, goals must be attainable.  Don't set a goal of "bench pressing 200 lbs in 3 weeks" if you're starting at 90 lbs.  You'll get discouraged by your lack of progress and give up before you ever started..

4) When you hit a goal, create a new one.  Don't settle. 

Go out and set some goals.  Follow the above rules.  Then report back.  Did you hit the goal? 

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

The Gift's Rules to Live By

I don't have a child.  I don't have one on the way.  But, here are some rules I try to live by and some things I definitely plan to pass along to any male heirs (or nephews).

Note: I put this together over night.  It is obviously a work in progress and it's sure to change.  I will try to keep you all updated.  Suggestions completely welcome!
Note 2: I'm a guy.  This list is shifted towards boys/men.  If any of my females readers would like to submit their own version, I'd be glad to post it!

In reverse order:

20) Always open and hold doors for women. Chivalry really does never go out of style.

19)  Use your turn signal, damn it.

18) Spacing. The key to driving is good spacing.

17) Clothes don't make the man... but they sure help with first impressions.

16)  Never throw the first punch… But always throw the last! Unless someone of authority is coming. Then play innocent.

15)  Work hard, Play harder.

14)  Learn to cook. You’ll never go hungry and you might just impress a girl or 2.

13)  Your family are the people you love. The people you care about. The people that care about you. Sometimes that has nothing to do with blood.

12)  Gifts are not just for special occasions. Neither are kind words.

11)  Respect not fear.

10)  Make it count… whatever you do go all in or don’t bother…

9)  Friendships are 2-way streets.

8)  Quality over quantity when it comes to friends.

7)  You'll make millions of memories in your life... let the bad ones go.

6)  Make mistakes. Make lots of mistakes. Learn from them.

5)  Regrets are natural. Letting them define you is not.

4)  Never lie to yourself.

3)  Don’t put the “P” on a pedestal. But worship the woman to whom it belongs!  (this is unisex, by the way.)

2)  If you ever feel alone or that no one in the world can understand what you’re going through, turn on the radio. There’s someone singing about it right now.

1)  Religion is choice... being a good person is not!



* I'm not going to lie and say I fully live by these "rules", but I try.  And at the end of the day I'm pretty proud of the man I've become!  A huge thank you to all those who've helped me understand and helped make me who I am.. Noteably my parents and one Ryan L. (my personal positivity coach).

Monday, February 14, 2011

1001 Rules for My Unborn Son

This blog recently came to my attention and it's pretty good...  More importantly though, it's pretty inspiring. 

I don't agree with everything on here obviously so I've been working on a list of my own.  It likely won't have 1001 things (more like 20), but I'll get that up as soon as possible.

In the mean time you know I always give credit where it's due, so before I throw out my list I wanted to give you the "original" (I'm sure this isn't the first list of it's kind, but it's the one that inspired me).

http://rulesformyunbornson.tumblr.com/

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Unseasonable...

I don't want to sound like an asshole here (if not here, then where?), but can't we (as a society) work on our fundamentals of the English language?

I really don't mean to sound harsh, but I've tried typing this several times and each time I read it I feel like I'm just taking cheap shots.  This is certainly not the intent.  Still, this must be said....

In the winter, there is no such thing as "unseasonably cold" weather.  This is exactly the season for cold weather.  There is no season where you would or could expect colder weather.  If you're trying to make the point that it's unusually cold, go ahead and say that..  No, you wouldn't expect the South to see temperatures in the 20's even in the winter.. and that's totally fair to say.. but still, there is no season colder than winter so if you were to get 20 degree temperatures this is exactly the right season. 

Some other adverbs you can use are:  unnecessarily, unreasonably, and ridiculously.... you get the point.


*Disclaimer:  I admit I am a bit critical here because I see what social media and texting are doing to the language and I fear for the day my niece writes "nite" instead of "night" on a school paper..

Monday, February 7, 2011

Leagues

I want to take some time today to clarify something... This concept of "leagues".  I don't know how to define leagues in a simple way, but I'm not talking about baseball leagues or organizations, etc.  I'm talking about "she's out of my league" leagues.. 

From our informative/school children days we are taught that there are jocks/cheerleaders and geeks/nerds.  And we are taught that they can't possibly coincide peacefully.  I know people believe in this concept of leagues. I know there are movies and television shows and books that emphasize these leagues... I know that in high school there is some realism behind this concept - when "cool" is the only thing that matters...

Truth is, however, after high school they just simply don't exist... 

Just think about it... if 1 person in that so-called upper echelon league is willing to "slum it", then there can be no such thing as leagues... If you approach all girls (or guys) as if they are that one exception - that one who is willing to 'settle' then you've already conquered the first step.  Eliminating this imaginary barrier. 
In fact, How I Met Your Mother (one of the best shows on TV) clearly demonstrates that in each relationship (I'll accept that this may be an over-generalization) there is always one "reacher" and one "settler".. This too illustrates my point... there are no leagues...

Sure they're are going to be some people just not interested, and maybe it is because they are too good for you (let's face it, leagues or not, some people just suck).. but more likely it's because you project this 'less-than-worthy' image out into the world.. and they conversely have no lack for self-esteem. 

Now that you hopefully understand there are no leagues (and that anyone is within your reach), all you have to do is gather some self-esteem and allow yourself to realize you are not someone to be settled for!

Addendum:  I was just asked a very good question..

"Is being in a settler/reacher relationship healthy? I wouldn't want to be in a relationship where I feel like the other person settled for me or that I felt that I had to settle."

I respond to this as such:  "The key is if the two people in the relationship know that they are settling.. In practice there is only a settler/reacher in the eyes of everyone else... When you're with the right person you'll both feel like you're reaching.. cause you'll both feel like the other is amazing..
It's only your friends that will look at the 2 of you and see that she's too good for you, or you chose a loser, etc.."
 
I hope this helps to clarify things.  Keep the questions/feedback coming!